Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
