Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
id be glad to
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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