Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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