Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize
