Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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