Non-Jews are for practice
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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