stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
