how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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