I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
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