Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Randomize
