I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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