This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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