if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
