tell your sister to shave her snatch
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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