Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
