I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
