wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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