watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
im holly from the hills drunk
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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