Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Randomize
