We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
