dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
