I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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