4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
