I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
He passed out mid-signature
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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