You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Randomize
