Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
