dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
operation have a gay friend backfired
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
