Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
