She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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