this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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