so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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