Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
