Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
They have beer where we have blood.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
