I smell stomach acid.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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