I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Walk of Shame today included voting.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
