my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
is it fun? or sober?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
