every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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