Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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