we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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