Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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