what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize
