I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
