We got so high we made milksteak
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
