these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
