the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
