My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
