i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
