I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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