You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
