he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
