Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
